15/09/2016

the night when we went outside to watch the skyline with cranes

that night
your eyes
were touching me
even before
your fingers did
you said
you want to
look me in the eye
to be deep inside
in
every
possible
way

we spoke about
some difficult words
unable to say out loud
those that are
so much more simple
later on
we've just 
became silent
in
every
possible
way

(morning)

10/08/2016

small print

surely it must be somewhere:
maybe it's written with the invisible ink
or tattooed somewhere on my back
or hidden under my hair...
"terms and conditions apply".
just next to "made in"
and "no warranty".
we both know
there is no spare parts
and I am already broken.
you smile and break me
a
little
bit
more.

07/07/2016

OK

when I stare ahead
with the absent look
on my face
you sometimes ask
these
always meaningless
three words

are you OK

I move pawns
on the board
in my head
I test how far
can I get
if I use a bishop instead
if I do castling

am I OK

I try to predict
your next
and another and another
move
I may frown
and say out loud
checkmate

it's not OK

14/06/2016

wrong choice

you've kept silent
about everything
that needs to stay
like that

muffled
muted
unspeakable
and fragile

(I've believed
that silence)

17/04/2016

duel (#1)

We are looking at the same thing, I guess. At least this is how it should be (almost for sure; maybe not; definitely yes). In the attempt to change my own perspective I move my head to the left, back to the centre and then to the right. I squint and bite my lip and most of all - I try not to look you in the eye. Space and time suddenly fall apart and I know it's exactly 12 PM, noon, and that spurs at our boots are the ones that are making this very faint clang. The hat, that you haven't had on your head just a moment ago, casts shadow on your face and the saliva in my mouth becomes bitter as if I had just bit a blade of grass. We stand opposite to each other but I don't think we can see one another. Everything that there is to it is just a dust on our faces and the Sun that burns our necks and shoulders; there is a yellow sky above and a very distant rumble of the storm that is approaching. (Obviously there is also all of that what is hiding in our fingerprints and shadows under our eyes.) Arms of the tower clock haven't moved for at least ten minutes now. Without thinking much about it I straighten up and tuck my hair to the back so I can look straight at you. I can't explain why I am so surprised that you are still here and that you are looking at me (into me, through me, to me). You are smiling. It starts to rain.

super glue

I've put glue
on my fingertips
so they stop bleeding
now -
- every time I touch
my face
I leave scratches
and faint red lines
on my cheeks
as if
I'd been
using sand paper

the futile attempt
to polish
my thoughts

02/04/2016

yoko meshi

yoko meshi (df): the peculiar stress of speaking a foreign language

I speak silent fluently
always have been
I can perfectly time
intervals between
blinking
looking down
walking away
and then
- being silent again
I have experience
in not saying
certain words
out loud
and not answering
questions

you stare at me
and don't want to
give up
I roll my eyes
I open my mouth
but all that
comes out
is just
a very distant
and weak
white noise
...